It's About Time!

Ok, ok, people.... I am officially the worst blogger EVER! Life has been so crazy the past month and a half... so much has been happening and weeks have been so packed that I've barely had time to process everything for myself, let alone make sense of it enough to blog about it. But here we go!

WARNING: this is going to be a total brain dump... it's going to be long and it might not all make sense. But we're going to give it a shot. You've been forewarned, lol :)

To start, in case you haven't read previous posts, I am currently in Tampa, FL at MacDill AFB completing what is known as the Nurse Transition Program (NTP). The program is intended to take brand new nurses from novice nurses to advanced beginners (aka feel comfortable with taking on a full patient load, like 4-5 patients, without failing miserably) before we get to our first duty stations (for me: Lackland AFB, San Antonio, TX). We are working at a civilian hospital called Tampa General Hospital (TGH) - a nationally recognized hospital which is also a Level 1 Trauma Center (aka - we get to see a lot of cool stuff!). We are the first group to go through this program, which has had it's ups and downs:

• Ups: people have been super excited for us to be here! I've had phenomenal nursing experiences throughout the hospital, and all of the staff are constantly looking for a way to help us gain more experience. We've also had several newspapers do articles on us --> Tampa Bay Times (http://www.tampabay.com/news/health/at-tampa-general-hospital-air-force-nurses-prepare-for-duty/1184075) and MacDill AFB website (http://www.macdill.af.mil/news/story.asp?id=123267905). We had a special "inaugural" Ribbon Cutting Ceremony with the top leaders of TGH and MacDill AFB a couple weeks ago... I didn't realize until I got down here how big a deal us being here is! TGH is only one of two civilian hospitals chosen to partner with the Air Force in training its nurses... in eternity-perspective I know it's not that big of a deal, but still kind of neat!

Our group (L-R: Sarah, Josh, Falisha, Rebecca, me) with our

course supervisors at the Ribbon Cutting Ceremony!

• Downs: we've hit a lot of snags along the way on the Air Force side with our pay and things like that since we are a brand new program and no one knows exactly what to do with us. It's been extremely stressful in trying to figure that all out, but things seem to be resolving (finally!)

As I said earlier, our schedules here have been absolutely ridiculous... try going from the relaxing of summer and post-graduation to 54 hour work weeks! YIKES! We work 3 twelve-hour shifts a week on a normal medical-surgical (med-surg) floor, 1 twelve-hour shift on a specialty unit (ex: Burn ICU, Neuro ICU, Emergency Room, Rapid Response Team, Wound Care Team, Vascular Access Team), and then an 8-hour classroom day every Thursday... to say I've been tired is the least one could say... more on that later, I suppose.

The best way I can think of breaking this up now is by topic... ok, deep breath, annnnnd go:

WORKING IN THE HOSPITAL:

I have had many fantastic nursing experiences here. The floor I'm working on is a complex medicine floor, and the acuity of the patients really varies from shift to shift. My very first day was practically "baptism by fire" onto the unit. Upon receiving our patients, my preceptor and I found one of the patients to be in desperate in need of going to the ICU (he was crashing quickly with an acute GI bleed and severe metabolic acidosis... aka, NOT.GOOD.). The previous shift had tried to get him to the ICU, but were running into some snags along the way. Immediately our attention had to be on him; however, we still had three other patients who needed to be taken care of. So as my preceptor took on our now ICU patient, I threw the notion of an "easy first day" out the window and went head on into patient care. My goal for the day (quite simply put): don't kill anyone. And I was successful! haha... but seriously, I knew that if God could help me handle being thrown that curveball on my first day as a real RN, I'd be ok. I've now been able to work up to taking on 4 patients (a relatively normal # for nurses) with relative comfort and confidence. Some other interesting experiences I've had include dressing amazing wounds in the Burn ICU, doing real CPR during a Code Blue, and learning all the skills and techniques of the art and science of nursing.

In the Simulation Lab with Falisha and Rebecca!

It's been tough though, real tough... there have been many days (ok, most every day) where I have felt so overwhelmed and so critical of myself because I'm not great at nursing yet. Yes, there, I said it. I felt like I learned so much during nursing school, but yet incorporating all of that in every day practice has been a real challenge for me (which is seriously frustrating). My perfectionistic and people-pleasing struggles have resurfaced all over again, at times leaving me to feel like I never learned anything about them in high school or college in the first place. But God has been teaching me and leading me so much through it. It's been a continuous time of leaning on Him for strength (try doing 5 twelve-hour shifts in a row... yeah...) and knowledge (who knows the human creation better than the Creator?) and above all else, GRACE. Grace which I so often for-go, thinking I should be good enough to not need it. But God is always there to lift my chin up after a long day, when all I feel is failure... always there saying, "My darling, you were great today. I know you don't think so, but I am building you, slowly but surely, into what I have specifically created You to be. Trust in Me... give me your failures, your worries, your stresses, your fears. Let me carry them. All I ask is that you love me and you love my people. The rest will fall into place."

MY FUTURE IN NURSING:

Needless to say, I've been a bit frustrated with nursing, which frustrates me even more when I think about the fact that it is what I will be doing with my life for the next four years. Call me over-dramatic, but there have been moments where I've seriously questioned God on whether or not I'm meant to be a nurse. Because this is so hard right now, I feel other desires welling up within me as a "way out" or as something "easier", but I know that those things would come with their own unique set of challenges. Honestly, I really think the majority of my frustrations come from (a) not giving myself grace to be the newbie, and (b) realizing that the population I'm working with (adults) is not the population God has given me such a passion and a fire for! Which leads me to something that is very exciting:

I found out last Thursday that I am going to be working in Pediatrics at Lackland AFB! This still is just crazy to me... I mean, who would think one could be a pediatric nurse in the Air Force?! I mean, come on!!! But God is so faithful! For those who don't know, I have so deeply desired to do pediatrics even before nursing school. God has engraved the desire to secure and protect the welfare of children around the world into the very fibers of my being... and I feel so incredibly blessed that He is providing a direct way for me to live out those passions! When I joined the Air Force, I was concerned that I wasn't going to be able to ever work with kids (mission work with children in third world countries was/is my dream!) and was something I really struggled through in making my decision. But God has literally moved mountains to get me to where I'm going. The pediatric unit I'm working on is LITERALLY the only floor in the entire Air Force that specializes in pediatrics. THE ONLY ONE. Can I get a PRAISE GOD for that one!!!!!!! Just amazing... I'm still giddy over it :) I feel so personally taken care of by God... I know He has picked this job just for me, and it is such an amazingly special gift. I could go into such detail on this one... but all I will say for now is that God knows the hearts of His children... heck, He created them! And I know God hears our prayers and listens when we ask things of Him. Sometimes, He says no. Sometimes He says not yet. But there will be times, my friends, when He will say YES. And boy, are they so sweet to the soul :)

OK... I have more to talk about, but I'm going to stop here for the evening. To be covered on Friday (my next day off!):

LIFE OUTSIDE OF WORK (ha...)

FAMILY & FRIENDS

MY HEART (ummmm, yeah)

In the meantime, please please please leave comments here or on Facebook or e-mail/text. It's been a very lonely and difficult past couple of weeks... I have made great friends here (I'm so thankful for you four!!!), but I miss you all so very much and deeply wish to be with my family and dear friends from home :( If you get a spare minute, I would love some encouragement or even just an update on how you are doing or how things are going. Thank you to those who have been encouraging me along the way! It means so much to me to hear from you :)

Love always,

Kaitlyn

Next Stop: Tampa!

"No, life cannot be understood flat on a page. It has to be lived; a person has to get out of his head, has to fall in love, has to memorize poems, has to jump off bridges into rivers, has to stand in an empty desert and whisper sonnets under his breath... We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?"

- Donald Miller, "Through Painted Deserts"

Hello there from Tampa, Florida!

The weather is a balmy 89˚ with sunshine… my kind of weather! I've got a brief minute here before checking into my room at the Air Force base, so I don't have time for a very insightful post. But it’s been a crazy past couple of weeks, so I wanted to fill you in!

God has been coming through left and right for me and my friends! It has been freakin’ amazing! Two weeks ago tomorrow I took the NCLEX (my nursing licensing exam). It was pretty tough (as expected), and I walked out of the exam feeling extremely discouraged. The next two days were full of prayer and asking God for the courage to continue trusting Him, no matter what the outcome. Two days later, I found out I PASSED! PRAISE GOD! I was so elated! I cannot begin to describe the feeling of relief and gratitude that filled my heart. Once I received my license information, it was off to the state capitol in Lansing where we met Lt Col Franz, and I officially commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in the United States Air Force! Who would have ever thought? ;)

The rest of the past week has been full of packing all of my earthly belongings (not much at this point, haha) into boxes and bags ready to move. It’s kind of surreal to see your life packed into boxes… from first birthday cards, to elementary school paintings, from high school pictures, to a college diploma, seeing all of your things packed up into a 7’x9’ area makes you consider how brief a dot we are on the line of eternity. I also had the blessed chance to spend time with my precious family and dear friends, enjoying each other’s company, laughing over old and new memories, and thanking God for the time He has given us.

Early Sunday morning, my mom and I packed up the CR-V and took off for our two-day trip to Tampa! We stopped the first night in Marietta, GA and welcomed the rest after 14 hours on the road. We got at it again Monday morning (Happy 4th!) at 4am and arrived in Tampa around 11am. The base I'm staying at (MacDill AFB) is GORGEOUS! It's surrounded by the Gulf of Mexico on all three sides and feels as though I'm staying in a resort rather than on an Air Force base! There is a beach on base (what what!) and a walking/running trail along the coast/edge of the base that I plan on taking full advantage of. Mom and I got to enjoy the beach, fireworks (minus a few pesky mosquitoes), and good company :) I know I may be a bit biased, but I have the BEST MOM IN THE WORLD! God definitely blessed me with a mom who is so caring and so in tune with God's heart... it's my hope I will be at least half the mom and woman she is! I love you Mom!

Our program (the "Nurse Transition Program" or "NTP") officially starts tomorrow and I can't wait to be a real nurse and carry out the mission that God has for me here in Tampa and then in San Antonio! The first two weeks here are all classroom work and then full time shifts at Tampa General Hospital (a civilian hospital only a short ways from the Air Force base) for six weeks. I'm excited to meet all of the new 2LT's (second lieutenants) that will be in the program with me. If it's anything like my AF internship experience last summer, I pray to walk away with some great memories and life-time friendships.

I have to get going, but I have some prayer requests:

- My family: my Aunt Laurel and Uncle Steve will be moving with their kids David and Amy down to Bradenton, FL (30 minutes away from Tampa! Such a God thing!) on Friday. Pray for their hearts (as it's hard to move away from our family who all live in Grand Rapids) and for safety for all involved in the move.

- God-centered relationships: I've been fervently praying that God would bring at least one or two people into my life here in Tampa that love Jesus and desire to seek Him with me while we are here. In addition, God has laid it on my heart to start a small group with whomever is interested. I've learned that godly community is vital to spiritual health and want to put everything out there in order for God to use me to build it. Pray for the hearts of the girls in my program who love Jesus to be open to being in a small group. Also, pray that we are able to reach out to those who don't know Jesus and that God would ignite a spark in them that draws them to Himself and to community.

- My heart: my heart is pretty raw right now for a number of reasons which I won't get into right now. But if you could please be praying that God would totally wrap me up in His love and give me courage to allow Him even further into the depths of my messy heart to continue bringing healing and peace. Pray that I would chase hard after Him in this time of new unknowns and experiences!

I miss you all back in MI so much! If you get a free minute, feel free to give me a call/text :)

In God's amazing grace,

Kaitlyn

"August Rush"

Some encouragement for your day...

Quote from August Rush:

Wizard: What do you want to be in the world? I mean the whole world. What do you want to be? Close your eyes and think about that.

August: Found.

God's Love Language: Part II - OBEDIENCE

I’ve been sitting on this post for a while now… mainly because I’ve been waiting for it to make its way from my head to my heart. But after several weeks, it seems as though I just need to get this out there as best as I can. THIS HAS BEEN ROCKING MY WORLD, and my only prayer is that God might use it to rock yours.

Much love,

Kaitlyn

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God’s Love Language: OBEDIENCE

Since being home from college, my sister Bethany and I have been attending Crossroads Bible Church in Walker, MI for church on Sundays. I had been to it once or twice before this summer, and was now drawn back to it because it greatly reminds me of my amazing church back in Ann Arbor, New Life Church – young people my age, great worship, and most importantly, biblically-solid, culture-challenging teachings. Several Sundays ago, the pastor, Matt Westerholm, was speaking from Acts 9:1-19 (here's the download if you want to listen to the whole thing).

Acts 9:1-19

Saul’s Conversion

¹ Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. He went to the high priest ² and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, so that if he found any there who belonged to the Way, whether men or women, he might take them as prisoners to Jerusalem. ³ As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. ⁴ He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”

⁵ “Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.

“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied. ⁶ “Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”

⁷ The men traveling with Saul stood there speechless; they heard the sound but did not see anyone. ⁸ Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes he could see nothing. So they led him by the hand into Damascus. ⁹ For three days he was blind, and did not eat or drink anything.

¹⁰ In Damascus there was a disciple named Ananias. The Lord called to him in a vision, “Ananias!”

“Yes, Lord,” he answered.

¹¹ The Lord told him, “Go to the house of Judas on Straight Street and ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul, for he is praying. ¹² In a vision he has seen a man named Ananias come and place his hands on him to restore his sight.”

¹³ “Lord,” Ananias answered, “I have heard many reports about this man and all the harm he has done to your holy people in Jerusalem. ¹⁴ And he has come here with authority from the chief priests to arrest all who call on your name.”

¹⁵ But the Lord said to Ananias, “Go! This man is my chosen instrument to proclaim my name to the Gentiles and their kings and to the people of Israel. ¹⁶ I will show him how much he must suffer for my name.”

¹⁷ Then Ananias went to the house and entered it. Placing his hands on Saul, he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord—Jesus, who appeared to you on the road as you were coming here—has sent me so that you may see again and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” ¹⁸Immediately, something like scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again. He got up and was baptized, ¹⁹ and after taking some food, he regained his strength.

Though Matt drew several conclusions from the text, one has since stuck with me. At one point, Matt made the following claim: “Just as humans are made in the image of God, and as humans have ‘love languages’ (note: see Gary Chapman’s book “The Five Love Languages”), it follows that God might also have a love language: that of OBEDIENCE.” Now, when he first said that, my instant reaction was: “WHAT?! You can’t give God a love language! At the maximum, that’s heresy and at the minimum, just ridiculous!” But as the sermon went on, I couldn't shake that thought out of my head.

Up until a couple of weeks ago, "obedience" to God left a bitter taste in my mouth. It seemed to me as though I was continually having give up my deepest desires (a husband, mission work, etc.... see previous post) in order to serve God in where He was leading me, feeling as if my desires didn't matter to Him. I mean, yeah I'm following God's leading, but what good is it if my soul isn't satisfied with what He's giving me right now? It seemed a depressing cycle: follow God = deny yourself = be unhappy = "suffer" for God = follow God. So many times I thought to myself, "Is this really worth it? If this is how God 'loves' me and blesses those who are obedient to Him, I'm not so sure if He loves me at all." Yet, like a "good little Christian girl", I buried my doubts, picked up the shovel of Bible verses I used to bury them, and pressed on, all the while allowing the devil to twist my view of "obedience" even more so to make me bitter and angry towards God.

So naturally, when Matt brought up the topic of "obedience" my heart went immediately on the defensive, somehow wanting to prove his statement wrong. LOVE? Obedience is love? You've got to be kidding me. So when my sister and I returned home from church, I voraciously tore through my Bible and biblegateway.com searching for what the Bible had to say about obedience to God... and I wasn't let down. Using the NIV version, I found around 300 references to obedience/ disobedience in the Bible (here's the search just for "obey")! I figured when I searched for terms, most of them would come from the Old Testament, where God is often pictured as a more "authoritarian" figure... in fact the entire book of Leviticus and most of Deuteronomy are commands from God! But what I found is that the references were spread out throughout the entire Bible, including the gospels and the letters from the apostles! What stood out most greatly to me not only was God's clear desire for our obedience to Him (Exodus 19:4-6; Leviticus 8:4; Nehemiah 1:8-10; Luke 11:28; John 14:22-24; Hebrews 11:7-9... just to name a few), but also His clear desire to bless us out of our obedience (Genesis 22:18; Deut. 6:25; Luke 11:28). And out of the passage Matt spoke from (Acts 9:1-19) two things have come to light for me that have absolutely rocked my world: (1) God will accept nothing but our obedience, and (2) God wants use our obedience to do BIG THINGS.

(1) God will accept nothing but our obedience to His will in order to bring the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the kingdom of God to every corner of the world.

Matt brought up a great point that as Christians, we tend to "hear" God's leading in one of two ways. First, there's the "quiet whisper." This gentle leading is much preferred to the second option. It is "easy on the ears" (read: our own will/desires) and often times, though not all the time, a reassuring nudge towards what we've already been living our lives for, desiring, or just makes sense to be the next step. One might align this sense of leading with the sentiments of the Psalmist in Psalm 23, as God leads him peacefully through "green pastures." The second way, however, is much more abrasive - it is a command. Most often it is a "Stop in whatever direction you are going and go another way." It is uncomfortable, often requiring extensive amounts of character growth and personal sacrifice. When God appears to Paul on the road, he doesn't politely tell him to go to Damascus; no, he commands it (v. 6). Similarly with Ananias - despite his excuses, God calls Ananias out not once, but twice (vv. 11 & 15)! He commands action from both of the men, and will not accept otherwise.

I think our culture and our generation has a serious "beef" (if you will) with the concept of obedience. We don't like people telling us what to do, when to do it, and sometimes, what we need to give up. And I'll be the first to admit I'm guilty... especially when it comes to my future (a.k.a. marriage and career). But imagine if Paul or Ananias hadn't been obedient to God's commands? What if they decided against the hard and uncomfortable things God was calling them to do? I have no doubt God could have used their decisions either way to still fulfill His plans, but the story of the world certainly would have played differently. Who wouldn't have heard the message of the saving Gospel? Who's eternity wouldn't have been forever impacted? The same eternity-impacting questions apply to your life and the choices you make today to be obedient to God's will for your life. God will accept nothing less than obedience.

(2) God wants to use our obedience to do BIG THINGS.

In the story of Paul and Ananias, God uses the obedience of Ananias to bring about physical, emotional, and spiritual healing in the man who is about to become one of the God's greatest instruments in spreading the Gospel of Jesus Christ, Paul. Acts tells us that after encountering Jesus on the road, Paul was blind and didn't eat or drink for 3 days (v. 9) - a Biblical picture/symbolism of death. After finding out he'd been persecuting not only the people of God, but the very Son of God (v. 5), I can only imagine what spiritual and emotional torment Paul must have been going through at that point! In comes Ananias. Despite probably being a little bit nervous to face the man who was killing his friends only a few days before, Ananias approaches with the greeting, "Brother Paul." Brother! Brother! Can you imagine that? A week ago this man was killing Christians, and now by the same Christians he is being called brother?! Can you imagine what that must have done for Paul's spirit? The lifting of guilt and shame, the washing the past in Christ's cleansing blood, and the freeing Paul to go and do God's work! To me, the regaining of Paul's eye sight becomes only a minute detail when compared to the soul-healing and LIFE CHANGE that God delivered through the obedience of Ananias!

And that, my friends, is the real reason God desires our obedience. He wants to use us to do BIG THINGS. To "loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke" (Isaiah 58:6). To "preach good news to the poor... to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners... to bestow a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning" (Isaiah 61:1-3). THAT is what we are obedient for.

I realize I've been asking God to love me like I often ask humans to love me, to encourage me, to sympathize with me, and make me feel "good" about my "situation" in life - where "my plans are ending and His plans are beginning." But we can all attest to the fact that human love is flawed and conditional. On the contrary, God's love is perfect and unconditional. And if His love language is obedience and He is calling, no, commanding me to follow the path He has so clearly laid out, the most perfect way I can show my love for Him is to be fervently obedient to what He has called me to do right now - to be a nurse in the United States Air Force in San Antonio, TX and to be a woman chasing after His heart and His heart alone.

I'll admit, it's uncomfortable, and it's hard. It's forcing all-out dependence on God and constant prayer. But that's exactly where I need to be and exactly where I want to be. Praise be to God. He is so good.

God's Love Language: Part I - "The Air Force Story"

The original post became too long, so I'm breaking it up into two segments :)

Part I - "The Air Force Story"

If you've heard me talk about this before, some of this may sound familiar. But please bare with me. This is the account of how God lead me to the Air Force (something I never dreamed of for myself)... I don't mean to brag, but it's pretty stellar:

If you would have told me four years ago that I would be in the military, I would have told you you were crazy. I first heard of Air Force ROTC upon attending my freshmen nursing orientation with my dad. To be honest, I didn't pay much attention to what they were saying... "Pay for school, yadda yadda, automatic job afterwards, yadda yadda." (With this economy, I don't know how I didn't grab onto this sooner! haha). On the drive home, my dad said, "So Kait, what did you think about that whole ROTC thing?" Rolling my eyes, barely believing that my dad had even brought it up, I just said, "No, Dad. Don't even think about it. I do not want to be in the military." And on this rare occasion, he left it at that (haha, love you Dad!). The military? No way... my plans for post-college at that point were to (1) marry the man I would meet in college (yes, this was a "plan"), (2) become an international missionary with my husband using my newly gained nursing skills and his "whatever" skills, (3) maybe work somewhere back in the States for a few years, (4) maybe do grad school, and (5) have kids in there somewhere. Call me crazy, but that's what I wanted and what I thought for certain would happen.

But as school drew nearer and the reality of paying ~$20,000/year for four years of school started to sink in, I started taking a look at my options. For some reason, I kept being pulled to look at the military. As much as I detested the thought at the time, I couldn't deny the benefits of having the military pay for my school... and like many of my colleagues, that is why I first looked into Air Force ROTC. Thankfully, that is not why I have stayed :) I figured that I would try it out for the first semester, see if I liked it, all while having a crafty way of keeping off that famed "Freshmen 15"! If at the end of the semester I didn't like it, I could walk away with no regrets and the ability to say, "Well, at least I tried it."

But after getting through a stressful first few weeks (those in ROTC know those are the worst! You feel totally incompetent bc you don't know anything!), I was hooked. I loved the discipline I was learning, the people I was meeting, and the sense of belonging (the strongest second only to the church!) I was feeling. At the end of the semester, I decided to apply to go on scholarship - where the military pays for your school, and you in turn commit to serving for a set number of years afterwards. I was nervous... a four-year's time commitment felt HUGE to me at that time. What could happen in those four years? Could I really handle the military lifestyle? I had a serious boyfriend at the time... how would he feel about it? Would he be ok with it? Was this really what God has in mind for me?

Do you ever try to "play games" with God? Saying, "Ok, God if you want me to do x, then you y." Well, I did that. I basically "said" to God, "Ok, God. If you want me to be in the Air Force, then have this scholarship go through by the end of the semester (the winter semester of freshmen year)." Ha, I've since learned from that experience that if you decide to put God to the test, don't be surprised when He flips it back around on you.

So I applied in January, and months, literally months went by without the scholarship going through. First some documentation got screwed up, then my file got sent to the wrong place, and my application just wasn't going where it needed to go. It came down to the last two weeks of school. I was begging God at this point, "Lord, please, if you really do want me to be in the Air Force, please let this work out." And I just kept feeling like He was asking me, "Kaitlyn, do you trust me? Do you trust me?" I finally got a call from now retired MSgt Christon (an amazing woman of God and one of the best NCO's (non-commissioned officer) in the Air Force!) two days before the end of the semester saying my application had been approved. I remember hanging up from that conversation and saying out loud, "Ok God, here we go!". I came in the next day (the day before the end of the semester), signed the paper work, swore in, and was officially a member of Air Force. Come to find out several years later that the day she called me, MSgt Christon felt God leading her to call a certain person about my file... a person who normally doesn't have anything to do with scholarship applications. Upon learning of my situation, that person literally went to a cubicle next door to them, picked up my file, walked across the street and hand-delivered it to the people who needed to approve it. Can you say A TOTAL GOD THING!!!!!

God has been using the Air Force in my life in so many ways! Please stay tuned for Part II of this installment - "God's Love Language: Part II - Obedience" - as I share about just one thing that God has been teaching me through the Air Force.

New Adventures...

Wrote this at 6AM... posted eventually at 11:33PM

"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies." ~Mother Teresa

Good morning ya’ll! My apologies that it’s been so long since my last/first post… so much has been happening that I haven’t had time to process it all for myself, let alone write it down! This is going to be more of an overview about what has been happening recently, with more thorough posts coming eventually!

I was just there!

Even though it’s just after 0600 as I’m writing this, I am wide awake and flying on my way back to Grand Rapids, MI after spending the past 3 days in San Antonio, TX apartment hunting and exploring SA with my dad (more on that to come!). And frankly, right now, I feel like a queen: drinking my Starbucks, listening to Adele (the diva herself and the new Vitamin String Quartet covers of her music – AMAZING if you haven’t heard of them, check ‘em out), gazing out at the beauty of the puffy clouds below me that look like a fresh fallen snow (one of my most favorite things), and feeling so grateful and crazy blessed for so many things.

Quite simply, I love flying and everything surrounding it. Ok, maybe not waiting in line for security, but everything else. To me, flying means adventure… it means going somewhere new, doing something new, meeting new people, and going out on limb to be used in some new way by God. And it’s always accompanied by a range of emotions – usually excitement (visiting loved ones in TN, learning in CO, serving in Jamaica/Haiti, singing in Austria), sometimes nervousness (28 days of Field Training – aka boot camp), but always a sense of adventure. But you want to know the best part of flying? The take-off. I’ve never considered myself an adrenaline junky, but as the plane pulls onto the run way, the jets boost, and the wheels come off the ground, I feel vibrantly alive. Every time, without fail. Even hearing a plane fly by, whether it’s over my house in GR or watching the F-16’s do touch-and-go’s outside my window while staying at Kelly Field (Lackland AFB), my heart quickens. It’s this sense of “alive” that I so desire to feel in my life every day and am convinced God wants for us, too. But I suppose that’s a whole other post J

The past few weeks have been crazy busy, and honestly rather overwhelming and filled with many different decisions, changes, and emotions surrounding those decisions/changes. Like "LIFE" changes. I'm just barely scratching the surface on working through them (how come "growing up" never seemed this complicated before?), but I hope to share more about them soon. Right now I’m studying for the NCLEX (the nursing licensing boards), which has been difficult to focus on – ok, *really* difficult, if you know what I mean J, haha. The task of studying EVERTHING NURSING feels overwhelming, and it’s a constant surrender to turn that overwhelm over to God and just take it a bit at a time. ((For all my recent nursing grads/fellow soon-to-be-RN’s: first of all, I miss you! Second of all, keep on keepin’ on! We’re so stinkin’ close! )).

A week ago, my sisters (Bethany and Kelly) and I ran our first “Sisters 5k” at the 2011 Riverbank Run in GR! Even though it was cold and rainy, we had a blast encouraging each other and finishing together! We’re planning on running another 5k together in June, and I’m contemplating training for the Air Force half marathon in October (What do you think? J)!

Love them! They bring such JOY to my life :)

I also bought my first car a week ago, a 2005 Honda CR-V! Craziness… which brings me to another thing I’ve been dealing with lately: money. Over the past few weeks, I’ve really been digging into my finances (current and projected as I start my first “real job” in July) and how our money is to line up with God’s will and desires, and boy am I learning a lot and being humbled a lot. Bethany (my sister) and I have been going through the “Financial Peace University” message series by Dave Ramsey, and it has been eye-opening. If you’ve never heard what Dave has to say, IT.IS.A.MUST. Seriously, if someone from New Life Church is reading this – we need to offer a small group series on this to college students!!! It's really that good. And I love that Dave teaches from a Christian perspective. Cool stuff.

As I mentioned above, I've spent the past three days scouring the city of San Antonio looking at apartments to live in come September when I move there for the Air Force. I was crazy blessed by my parents and grandparents to have the opportunity to go down there this week to check things out... I know it's going to make things a lot less stressful come September when I'll have a week in between my nursing training in Tampa, FL and my nursing job in SA to drive to SA and move in my stuff. My dad and I went to at least 20 different apartment complexes (please tell me we're crazy), but I've been able to narrow it down to three that I'd be happy to live in any of them (have to have a few in mind depending on their Sept. availabilities). Throughout the trip, my heart has been all over the place. It was really cool being able to show my dad where I'm going to be working (working at San Antonio Medical Center North - aka SAMC-North, and based out of Lackland AFB), and driving around the city and seeing and feeling the open opportunities there. I so firmly know that God wants me in the Air Force (a crazy story if I've never told you - Proverbs 19:21) and is bringing me to that city.

But at the same time, it was weird to be driving around and looking at apartments, one of which will be my new home for several years... being in places where I will meet new people, do new things, and make new memories... ah, but those thoughts are like daggers to my heart right now. You see, though college days brought their trials and heartaches, I have an amazing community of people that has stood by me, rejoiced with me, prayed with me, prayed for me, cried with me, and carried me. They are my amazing family, my amazing friends... and I don't want to leave them. This is a huge thing I'm working through right now (along with so many other things surrounding moving/growing up) and really want to give it justice in writing, so I'll refrain for the moment and decidedly wrap it up here, only to ask you for a few quick prayer requests:

- Pray for the military men and women serving here in the U.S. and overseas. Being back at Lackland AFB (where enlisted airmen are going through basic training, where so many careers begin, where so many of the deploying troops are routed through) really put things into a greater perspective for me. There is such a need in the military for God's love... and just as anywhere else, people are hungry for truth and for love. God's gonna' rock that place... I have a feeling :)

- Pray for my friends Cameron, Betsy, and Amanda who are in Kenya right now with a team from our church in Ann Arbor (New Life Church). Cameron's been blogging while they've been over there, so check it out if you have time --> http://camlafleur.blogspot.com/. God is doing beautiful things through them and teaching them so much. Pray for their physical safety and for emotional and spiritual protection.

- And finally, pray that God would soften my heart towards all these changes going on around me... that I would genuinely surrender them to Him and wait patiently to see His guiding hand in my life.

To those who made it all the way through that, kudos and thank you ;)

Love always,

Kaitlyn

First Post!

"The result of diligence is a faith that is strong and willing to inherit the fulfillment of the promises of God." - A. W. Tozer

While some might say I'm jumping on the "blog" band wagon, really, I've been thinking about creating one for quite some time. There have been so many exciting things happening in my life and so many upcoming changes, that this seemed like the best way to keep the greatest number of people updated! I am about to embark on a crazy journey, taking me literally across the country, away from my amazing friends and family, away from the familiar and blessed life I have here in Michigan, yet into a journey I have no doubt God has brought me to and will bring tremendous blessings through. My desire is to be transparent about my victories and my battles, for life comes with both. Some posts maybe of actual things that are happening, some of things I'm learning. I might even throw in a new wonderful recipe or craft I've tried every now and then :) As I take on this new phase of life, your prayers and words of encouragement will be greatly appreciated and needed!

Truly, this is - a life unexpected.

But all-together wonderful none-the-less :)